There is a lot of discussion right now about unhealthy relationships, which focus on recognizing the “red flags” of problematic behaviors. While those conversations are critically important, discussing the signs of a healthy relationships is equally important.
Here are 8 things to look for in a healthy relationship.
Negotiation and Fairness:
Partners seek mutually satisfying resolutions to conflict, can accept change and are willing to compromise.
- Asks your opinion and respectfully listens to your answers
- Is comfortable with you having different opinions from them
- Does not take it as a personal insult if you disagree with them
Non-Threatening Behavior:
Partners speak and act in ways that cultivate and support a safe and comfortable environment in which they can express themselves and make decisions.
- Is someone who you feel safe with
- Makes positive statements about your strengths and achievements
Respect:
Partners listen non-judgmentally, are understanding and emotionally affirm and value their partner’s opinions.
- Cultivates a safe atmosphere where you can share thoughts and feelings
- Treats other people, as well as themself, with respect
Trust and Support:
Partners support each other’s goals and respect each other’s feelings, friends, activities, contributions and opinions.
- Supports your relationships with friends and family.
- They spend time with your friends and family to get to know them, and will give you space to spend time with your friends and family alone
- Trusts you and is trustworthy
Honesty and Accountability:
Partners accept responsibility for themselves, acknowledge past behaviors, can admit being wrong and communicate openly and truthfully.
- Accepts responsibility for their own behavior, thoughts and feelings
- Apologizes when they are wrong and accepts your apology when you are wrong
Shared Responsibility:
Partners reach mutual agreement on fair distribution of work and make family decisions together.
- Considers your relationship a partnership
- Is someone who you feel safe with
Economic Partnership:
Partners make financial decisions together ensuring that both partners benefit from financial arrangements.
- Expects both/all partners to control their own money
- Does not use manipulation (financial, emotional, etc.) to get what they want
Responsible Parenting:
Partners share parental responsibilities and are positive, non-violent role models for children
- Shares in decision-making
- Resolves conflicts through clear dialogue without using insults, threats or violence